Wanting others to ‘awaken’ says more about us than them. Here’s why

Awakening is a funny concept.

Often, the journey to enlightenment comes after going through a particular trauma and studying to find life beyond your egoic self. You go on a deeper life mission to find out about yourself and the rest of the world, you realise the beauty in oneness and you seek to share it with the rest of the world because “oh my God! If my life is so much better, imagine how everyone else will feel when they hear about this!”

Then you realise the process of healing isn’t linear. You realise there’s a plethora of healing methods and coping mechanisms as you enter a phase of trial and error. You try to unlock the shadow self, which gets messy and painful. You manoeuvre around the mess trying to clear it whilst walking towards the light of your “true” self outside of the ego.

Then you start to make peace with life and its ebbs and flows. You begin to view things from a higher perspective, but allow yourself the space and time to allow your emotions to process how you’re feeling. In fact, your feelings become your priority and something you honour as opposed to something to suppress in a bid to achieve this utopia of rationalism that we were conned into buying.

Ahh, it feels so good! We’re free, we’re awake, we’re spirits with bodies and egos, but we’re no longer bound by the myth that they are all we are!

So why isn’t anyone else awakening? Why is everyone around me suffering and I’m not?

It’s frustrating, I know. You see people suffering and you want to snap them out of it so they can live their best lives.

The real question is: What does their lack of spiritual awareness represent to you and what does it say about your journey?

Let’s be real. Who even said your awakening is done? If your ego is telling you to pressure others, you’ve got some more digging to do. Not that it’s shameful, it’s human.

Life is a mirror. Everything around us that causes us to emotionally react has a root in how we view ourselves and how we view the world.

Don’t just ask yourself why you want said person to awaken. Start off simple. What does this person represent to you? What emotions do you feel when you think about them?

Write them down. Happiness, hopelessness, frustration, anger, your need for acceptance, your need to be loved, your need to fix people/things, etc etc.

You may, or may not see patterns right away. Meditate on them and continue to do soul searching work to figure out what these patterns are and where they came from. Every day, you observe and release. When the inclination to try to control another person’s awakening comes, observe it.

You may realise that yes, you do love this person, but they spend all their time judging you that you want them to awaken so you feel accepted. You may realise it’s a part of your martyr/saviour complex where you don’t feel worthy unless you attach your happiness to the happiness of someone else. The reasons and possibilities are endless.

Path of least resistance

One of the laws of the universe is the path of least resistance. This means energy is more likely flow in the direction where there’s lots of tension. It’s a pretty beautiful law, but it’s also amongst the reasons people stay in toxic cycles throughout their lives because so many of us are afraid of the unknown and don’t take kindly to change. So the path of change tenses up.

It’s hard to see our loved ones suffer, but when we force people to leave their natural spiritual route, we make them suffer more. A spiritual awakening should never come from an interventionist stance. It causes more resistance and those unawakened will continue their path because it has the least resistance.

Our energies are intertwined. When you see someone enjoying a dish at a restaurant and you become tempted to try it not because of the dish itself, but because of the emotional and energetic reaction it invoked.

So really, even stressing about someone else’s journey is toxic. You need to find what it is within you that is causing your body and spirit to tense up and let it go.

Situations are different. Of course, when someone is harming themselves or others, direct intervention is needed to actively stop someone from doing something dangerous. Matters of the spirit are different. The most you can do is show the that there is another way, make them feel safe and let them be. Seek to inspire through your inner glow as opposed to pressuring from your ego.

You’re all beautiful. Sending you all love

Instagram: @flowerknafeh
Twitter: @superknafeh

Let’s clear our minds with tea – my current top five

Tea, glorious tea!

We’ve all been so stressed recently. We survived the end of mercury retrograde, a super full moon, a full moon in virgo and information overload about a certain issue that has taken over our lives, newsrooms and conversations.

I’ve been feeling so helpless and stressed recently and herbal tea has been one of my go-to’s to calm me down. Herbal teas have different benefits which work to detox your body, but they’re also so good for your mind and soul.

Even the process of making tea is soothing. Putting the kettle on, pouring it into a mug, holding the mug and letting your hands absorb the warmth whilst it infuses, smelling the tea as it brews… God ❤️

You can find the teas mentioned in most places, especially health shops. I’ve posted links below, but you can get them anywhere.

Tulsi clarity by Pukka

This is one of my newly discovered favourites. I chose this first because I’ve been managing extra stress and when a friend gave me a sachet, it calmed me right down. I was initially sceptical about the taste, but it has a mild herby taste and takes to the sweet side.

Stress attacks the immune system and that makes us vulnerable to illnesses — something that we’re trying to stay away from in this current climate. Without mentioning the illness, we do need to take to herbs and hydration to keep our minds and bodies at optimum level.

Tulsi tea also has practical benefits for the immune system, because the plant itself is an immunomodulatory. It helps prevent certain respiratory illnesses (which is what the current pandemic is) ranging from coughs and the common cold to bronchitis and asthma. Tulsi fights inflammation, regulates blood sugar and fights oral bacteria so it’s another herbal way to keep your mouth nice and fresh.

It’s also good for your skin and amazing for people with acne!

Click here to buy

Moroccan mint green tea by Dragonfly

A friend at work gave me a tea bag of this and I’ve been obsessed! Once one of my many boxes of tea runs out, I’m adding a few boxes to my tea collection. A lot of my Moroccan friends and relatives use gunpowder green tea for their atay, so when I was brewing it, my expectations grew.

It tasted amazing. Usually, I find the mint overpowers the tea. There are times I love it, but other times, I want a more subtle minty taste. Gunpowder green tea has a smokier flavour, which I also love. The brew doesn’t taste exactly like atay, but it’s still yummy!

Gunpowder green tea has a higher percentage of caffeine so it’s great for energy. It’s also good at reducing cholesterol, good for the immune system, anti ageing and keeps your cells nice and healthy!

Click here to buy

White tea

White tea is a God send! I remember finding out about it around 10 years ago when someone tweeted about Clipper’s white tea with vanilla (yummy) and I was so curious to try it that I took myself to a health shop to buy a box.

After that, I began learning about different types of tea and herbal infusions. It’s similar to green tea but it is more concentrated in antioxidants (the same type, albeit) and is sweeter. It’s also slightly lower in caffeine.

For those who dislike green tea, white tea is something to consider. I hated green tea for the longest time (partially because I didn’t know which brands of tea to go for) and only stuck with white tea.

Click here to buy

Choco Chili by Yogi Tea

Yogi tea is one of my favourite tea brands. Their range is organic, ayurvedic and delicious and I loveeee how their tea labels have cute mantras. Tea is a relaxing experience and drinking it with nuggets of wisdom makes drinking tea so much more valuable.

Choco chili is my favourite tea of theirs right now. It tastes like a chocolatey chai, with spicy and sweet undertones to it.

The mixture contains cocoa seeds, chilli, liquorice, cinnamon, ginger, black pepper, carob, anise, barley malt, cloves, cardamom and vanilla beans. It’s very rich in flavour but is also high in antioxidants, has anti inflammatory properties and has herbs that have been used to treat symptoms of cold and flu.

It’s inspired by the xocolatl drink, something the Aztecs and the Mayans considered a drink of luxury and one for extra strength and endurance.

It’s also perfect with milk. I add a splash of plant milk, mix it up and enjoy.

Click here to buy.

Ginger Lemon by Yogi Tea

Disclaimer: I really don’t like ginger and lemon. But it’s so good for you and we’re all trying to boost our immunity. I bought this for my mum because she likes ginger and lemon tea, but if I’m going to review it, I have to make a cup myself. Here goes.

There are lots of ginger and lemon blends out there, but this stood out because it has liquorice root, lemongrass, peppermint leaf and black pepper — all of which are good for you and means you don’t get that typical isolated ginger and lemon taste (PRAISE DA LORD).

Lemongrass is amazing at reducing inflammation, works as a pain relief and helps to reduce fevers. Peppermint is good for headaches, clogged sinuses, low energy, helps fight bacterial infections and is good for menstrual cramps. Black pepper is also an anti inflammatory ingredient, high in antioxidants and improves brain function. Liquorice tea helps to reduce sore throats, protect the stomach lining and is good for your skin and teeth.

Not bad for additives to your typical ginger and lemon! This can also be another tea for PMS symptoms.

It’s been brewing for around 5 minutes. I definitely don’t feel disgusted by the taste, the way I usually do with ginger and lemon, but I don’t see myself drinking it for the taste. It feels healing to swallow and I’m loving the way the spices are warming my food pipe and chest.

Click here to buy.

There are so many more, but those will be for another post. Follow me on my Instagram for more tea-related fun and to join in our conversation on wellness! xox

Instagram: @flowerknafeh
Twitter: @superknafeh

PS: Affiliate links used in this post.

Too anxious to meditate? I got you. Here are some tips

Hello lovely people.

I’ve had some people ask me about mediation and visualisation. Last week, I tweeted that I managed to treat my PMS cramps with visualisation when I was tucked into bed and was too tired to get pain killers. Since then, people have been wondering how to tap into this energy themselves.

Honestly, I didn’t know I was capable of doing this. I practice yoga all the time and I love meditation and mindfulness. I also believe in the power of the mind as a mechanism of healing, but I didn’t think I was spiritually awakened enough to to see results of pain relief if I tried it at this so-called “stage” in my spiritual journey.

But here we are. God really showed me the power of my own mind right there.

Before I do a deep dive, I want you all to understand the difference between fight or flight and flow state. If you don’t understand this, you won’t understand mediation.

The ability to meditate is our birthright. Naturally, we find adventure in the unknown. We’re able to close our eyes, allow our bodies to fall into sync with our higher selfs and trust. The reason so many of us find it so difficult to meditate is because our fight or flight is perpetually on and we can’t reach flow state.

Living the lives we do, we’re conditioned to be in a perpetual state of anxiety. We always feel as though we have to defend ourselves from something. This is when our fight or flight is on. It’s supposed to be a temporary state to get us out of extreme danger. But in this day and age, it’s the default.

Naturally, our default is supposed to be flow state. Rather than fearing the unknown the way the human body, humans are supposed to find adventure in the unknown. As opposed to associating the unknown with anxiety, we are supposed associate it with peace and enjoyment. Naturally, we’re supposed to trust it as a process and trust in the benevolence of the destination.

So where does meditation come into the picture?

If you cannot enter flow state, you cannot meditate. If you find yourself in your state of anxiety/fight or flight, all you need to do is recognise it for what it is and observe it.

How does this feel? Which parts of my body are tensing up? Am I shaking anywhere? How fast am I breathing? What may be happening?

Approaching your anxiety with a sense of curiosity calms it. Focus on how your body is feeling and be aware of the sensations. When thoughts come through, simply be aware of them too. Don’t fight your thoughts because they will fight back. Let them sit. And breathe. They can’t defend themselves when you’re flushing them out with breath-work.

There are many breathing techniques out there. One of my former yoga teachers taught me the 4-7-8 breathing technique, which I used when I had anxiety.

Breathe in for four seconds, hold for second seconds, out for eight seconds. Repeat until you feel better.

Breathing is core to meditation.

When you focus on your breath, you’re focusing on the energy that is connecting your body to your soul, thus keeping you alive. You can simply meditate by closing your eyes and focusing on your breath.

You can also look up different meditations. In kundalini yoga, there’s a plethora of meditations we use (if you belong to a religious faith and you feel uncomfortable with some of the chants, you can omit them or do a different meditation).

If you want, I can make a list of different breathing techniques.

Okay, but how do we visualise?

I taught myself visualisation through using guided meditations. Look them up on YouTube, Spotify or even yoga/meditation websites and find videos for different occasions or feelings.

When I visualised my PMS cramps away, I put my hands on my belly and imagined a warm gold ball loosening my muscles just because I felt like it. I could have imagined a red ball, I could have imagined massaging hands, the only restriction was my mind.

The trick is, I entered flow state through my breath. This is where beginners may need help because they need to be guided into relaxation. I still use guided meditations when I can’t seem to relax, want a fresh visualisation or want to do a yogic meditation.

See it in your mind’s eye/third eye

You don’t have to, but you can also use your pineal gland. Close your eyes, breathe and focus your eyes between your eyebrows. This is a very powerful state because you’re opening your third eye chakra.

Use healing/relaxing sounds

If you want relaxing sounds in the background, but not necessarily a guided meditation, you can use healing frequencies. I made playlists for each chakra you can use. You can even use playlists to time your meditation.

Most importantly, don’t worry about the amount of time you meditate. Just do it. Even if it’s for a few minutes. Progress is key. The last thing you want to do is stress about a mechanism we use to intentionally help us relax, heal and manifest.

Good luck and don’t hesitate to contact me on my socials if you have any questions xox

Instagram: @flowerknafeh
Twitter: @superknafeh

Image by mohamed Hassan from Pixabay